The Bunny Professor
by tsukiryoushi
Summary: Brandy and Mr. Whiskers fic. When Mr. Whiskers wants to become cooler he accidentally finds a formula that turns him into a handsome, debonair alter ego. But what will be the consequences? Based on The Nutty Professor.
1. The Bunny Professor

This story was inspired by the movie "The Nutty Professor." The old one with Jerry Lewis, not the new one with Eddie Murphey. I dunno, call me a sucker for older comedies.

Anyway, while the plot will be similar, and many of the quotes from the movie will be used, this is not gonna be a carbon copy of the film, but will hopefully be seen as a Brandy and Mr. Whiskers story that pays tribute to a classic. Or, at the very least, I hope you find it funny. lol. Enjoy!

(I do not own BaMW, or The Nutty Professor.)

-Chapter 1-

Another calm day in the Amazon, as the animal denizens of the jungle went about their businesses as usual, shopping in the Mayan temple-slash-mall, when suddenly an explosion rocked the entire structure.

As the quaking finally came to a halt, Gaspar jumped from the rubble of his demolished store and growled angrily. "Who is responsible for this?!" he demanded.

"I'll give you one guess," Margo grumbled as she walked by, covered head to toe in black soot. "That hair-brained hare and his otter pal were messing around in the new fireworks store!"

"Oh, he was, was he?" Gaspar asked, and turned to his monkey henchmen. "Bring me that rabbit!"

Meanwhile, in what remained of the fireworks shop, Ed was looking through the rubble in search of his friend. "Mr. Whiskers?" he called. "You here, buddy?" Suddenly, he heard a knock and looked down to see he was standing on a door, which had been blown down hinges and all. He reached down and opened it, to see Mr. Whiskers smashed into the floor. "You alright, Mr. Whiskers?"

Whiskers pulled himself up out of the rabbit-shaped hole in the ground, and rubbed his head. He was covered in soot, and his orange jumpsuit was terribly scorched. "I think so, Ed," he replied with a cough. "But that is the last time I eat red-hot chili in a fireworks shop!"

"Yup, I would definitely say that has some potent consequences there, Mr. Whiskers," Ed agreed.

Whiskers nodded and stood up, brushing himself off. But then, his arms were grabbed by Gaspar's two monkey henchmen. "Oh, hey guys…" Whiskers said with a nervous chuckle. "What, uh… brings you here"

"The boss wants to see ya," the shorter monkey said, and Whiskers gulped nervously.

---

Later, Whiskers timidly approached Gaspar, who sat in his throne in his cavernous lair, glaring daggers at the rabbit.

"Sit down, Mr. Whiskers," Gaspar commanded, gesturing to a plush chair nearby. Whiskers complied and sat down, but nearly sank into the enormous cushion. Gaspar glared down at Whiskers, before looking up at the trail of sooty rabbit tracks all over his floor. He then looked back down at Whiskers. "So, tell me," he said at last, "How long have ju been in the jungle now?"

"Um, do you mean in terms of an exact date," Whiskers asked, "or do you just want a ballpark figure? Or maybe you'd rather…"

"HOW LONG?!" Gaspar shouted, causing Whiskers to sink farther into the cushion.

Whiskers cleared his throat nervously and pulled out an old pocket watch he'd recently found. He opened it, and it began to loudly play the Mickey Mouse Club theme song, until he finally closed it again. "Um, two years, eleven months, and three weeks, give or take a day… By the way, impressed that I can tell time now?"

"No. And in all that time, do ju realize how much damage ju have done to my glorious jungle?"

"Um, did you want an exact percentage, or…"

"A lot, Mr. Whiskers, a lot! And if anyone will be causing chaos and destruction, it will be me! Do ju remember last year, when ju were trying to build your own time machine using that old crashed airplane? What the main fuel for it was?"

"Um… gasoline, gunpowder and nitroglycerine?"

"Jes. And do ju remember what the results were?"

"Negative."

"And…?"

"Um… noisy?"

"Noisy?!" Gaspar jumped angrily from his throne. "Ju demolished an entire Mayan pyramid! Half the rainforest was wiped out, because of ju!"

"Oh yeah, that reminds me," Whiskers said cheerily. "I saw Norman the other day. You know the marmoset that was there that day?"

"Oh? And how was he?"

"Oh he said he was starting to feel better and that the bandages would be coming off in just a couple more months."

"Ah, well that is good to hear, I—See?! That's it exactly!" Gaspar pointed accusingly at Whiskers. "Ju are a menace to this entire jungle! Now, don't get me wrong, Whiskers," Gaspar calmed himself a bit and smiled, "Everyone has their own… eccentricities. Einstein hated haircuts; Da Vinci loved to paint and Newton…"

"Something about figs, right?"

"And ju, too, are a little… eccentric. But try not to blow things up anymore! Especially considering my upcoming birthday. I will be throwing a stupendous celebration in honor of the jungle's most glorious leader—me! So I don't want ju messing it, up, understood?!"

"Sure thing, Gaspar, you can count on me!"

Gaspar nodded, but motioned for Whiskers to come closer. "Oh, and, Whiskers? That watch ju found… Does it always…?"

"Oh, no," Whiskers replied and took the watch from his pocket. "Only when I open it like this." He opened the watch, and both their ears were bombarded by the sound of the Mickey Mouse Club theme, before Whiskers sheepishly closed it again and left.

---

Later that same day, Whiskers had joined his best friend in the world, Brandy Harrington, at the watering hole, where she was now sunbathing on the beach.

"So you managed to blow up the mall," she said with a scoff, "again. Nice job, Whiskers."

"I know, I know," Whiskers sighed. "I just can't help it! I'm always messing things up…"

"Yeah, that is true."

"Oh, great job cheering me up…" Whiskers sighed again and sat down next to Brandy.

Brandy sat up and looked over at the hare next to her and sighed. "Alright, look, you want my advice?" He nodded. "Just stop doing dumb things like running around fireworks stores, and building explosive time machines… or dressing up in lederhosen and trying to teach wild boars to square-dance."

"Yeah, that really wasn't my brightest moment, was it…?"

"No. Whiskers, I'm not saying you shouldn't be yourself, just… try to be a little less destructive. I guarantee people will like you better if you do that."

"Oh good… I'm getting really tired of always being stepped on. Just then, a large animal ran by, right over Whiskers. He pulled himself up, spitting out sand and shouted, "Hey! Why dontcha watch who you're walking on, you big jerk?!"

Suddenly, the animal—who happened to be a large jaguar—stopped and turned to growl at Whiskers. "What was that?" the Jaguar demanded.

Suddenly, Whiskers felt himself shrink to two inches high and squeaked "um… nothing."

The Jaguar stomped over to Whiskers and glared down at him, his fangs glistening and his claws flexing. "I don't think you had any right to be calling me names, rabbit!"

"Oh, uh, well, I may have been a little rash… Oop!" Suddenly, the Jaguar picked Whiskers up by his ears and slammed him down again, burying him up to his chest in the sand. The Jaguar laughed cruelly and jogged away.

Whiskers struggled to get free, as he could hear the other animals chuckling at him. "Well don't just do something, sit there!" He shouted, then shook his head. "Uh, I mean… aw, forget it."

Brandy sighed to herself and began to dig her friend out. "You okay, Whiskers?" she asked as he crawled out of the hole.

"Yeah, except for my pride…" Whiskers replied sheepishly. "I guess I shoulda known better than to stick up for myself."

"No, Whiskers, you were right to stick up for yourself." Brandy picked up her beach towel and stood up, placing a comforting paw on Whiskers' shoulder. "Don't let guys like that get you. Just because he's stronger he thinks its okay to pick on a smaller animal."

Suddenly, Brandy's words began to echo in Whiskers head. _"Pick on a smaller animal… pick on a smaller animal…"_

"Oy!" Whiskers' brain shouted. "I think it's about time you did something about the echo in here, Bubalah!"

Ignoring his brain, Whiskers smiled. "Thanks for the advice Brandy! I think I know how I can finally become a new and improved Mr. Whiskers!"

"Great, great," Brandy answered half-heartedly. "Now if you'll excuse me, I've gotta get home and get ready for a date. See ya Whiskers!"

Whiskers waved as Brandy walked away. "See ya later, Brandy! As for me… I'm off to the gym!"

---

Not much later, Whiskers had indeed traveled to the Amazon's only Gym, "Jungle Bob's Gym and Health Spa." He entered the building, trying not to be intimidated by the larger, stronger animals around him.

"Welcome to Jungle Bob's Gym," a muscular howler monkey greeted him at the door. "My name is Dave, how can I help you?"

"Well," Whiskers replied, "I'm hoping I can build up my muscles a bit."

"Well, you've come to the right place, Buddy! Here at Jungle Bob's, we can turn even the wimpiest wimp into a Herculean marvel!" Whiskers smiled. "You might be more of a challenge, but we'll give it a shot." Whiskers' smile faded quickly. "So buck up pal, we'll have you in shape in no time!" Dave gave Whiskers a friendly pat on the back, but ended up knocking the poor rabbit down, instead.

"Whoa, sorry about that!" said Dave, as he helped Whiskers back up. "You okay?"

"Uh, yeah," Whiskers answered, "I guess so… if you'd call a man with an ulcer and a splinter in his finger and a nail in his foot who was then struck by lightning was fine, then yeah, I'm fine!"

"Great. Well, come over here and we'll get you started. You'll start by working on your upper body." Dave led Whiskers to a wall where there were two pulleys, attached to weights on the other side of the wall.

"So, what do I do here?" Whiskers asked.

"You pull on these," Dave answered, demonstrating for Whiskers.

"Oh, I see! Lemme try…" Whiskers took one handle in each hand and began to pull. He discovered, though, that this took all the strength he could muster, and when he had pulled the cords their full length he found himself pulled right back to the wall. "Okay, I think I got it," Whiskers said proudly, though he was already out of breath.

"Great!" said Dave. "Well then, I'll see ya later. Happy muscles!"

Dave walked away, and Whiskers nodded. "Yeah, I hope so…" He pulled against the weights with all his might again, and was pulled back to the wall. He pulled again, and again he was pulled back. "Yeah, not too bad," Whiskers lied to himself, as he pulled with all his might away from the wall. What he failed to realize, however, was that a repairman was working on the other side of the wall, and just as he had pulled as far as he could the cords came loose and he zoomed foreword, crashing into the opposite wall.

The rest of his time at the gym wasn't much more successful, either. He tried bowling, but even after he had found a ball light enough for him to lift, he couldn't manage to hit a single pin. If flamingos counted as pins, however, he would have gotten several strikes. And when he tried running a treadmill, he ended up caught in the gears. How he managed that, even he couldn't say. One day, he watched as a very large alligator twice his size struggled to lift a very heavy dumbbell over his head, and whistled in amazement.

"Hey, how do you do that?" he asked. "Wow, that must take a lot of patience!"

"Yeah," the Alligator huffed back. "And a little _muscle_!"

"Oh yeah, I guess it does… say, think I could try?"

"Well… I don't think you'd have the patience for it," the alligator grumbled sarcastically.

"Maybe, but I do have the other thing—a little muscle. Ha, funny, huh?"

"Well, alright, shrimp," the alligator lowered the weight and turned to Whiskers. "Give it a try." He shoved the dumbbell into Whiskers hands.

Whiskers huffed and puffed, trying to lift the weight, but the dumbbell wouldn't go any higher and instead fell to the ground. Unfortunately, Whiskers didn't let go, and his arms were stretched all the way to the ground. It wasn't all that bad, considering how that night he was able to scratch his feet while he was lying in bed, without sitting up.

---

Two weeks later, Whiskers and Ed sat by the river, as Whiskers somberly tossed rocks into the water.

"Oh, Ed, I don't know what to do!" Whiskers sobbed. "I've been trying for two weeks, and I'm still not strong! I think I'm even weaker than before!"

"Well, Mr. Whiskers," Ed replied in his usual, slow way, "I don't claim to be an expert, but my guess is that not everyone responds to physical training. And I must say, I'm pretty surprised to see you working so hard at this. I mean, is getting even with some random bully really worth it?"

"Oh, no, Ed! This isn't about getting revenge! Well, it may have started that way, but now I'm trying to improve myself, to make myself a better bunny!"

"Well, Mr. Whiskers, I personally think there's really no need to improve yourself, but who am I to argue if you want to better yourself somehow. After all, plenty of people try to improve their lives with diet, exercise, a change in lifestyle, even using products created from the rainforest we live in."

Suddenly, a light went off and Whiskers got an idea. "Wait a minute…" he said, "I'd almost forgotten about that!"

"Eh, forgotten about what?" Ed asked.

"The rainforest! All those herbs and plants have different purposes, right?"

"Well, that's true, Mr. Whiskers, but I fail to see what this has to do with your problem."

Whiskers ignored Ed now, as he hopped up and down excitedly. "This is perfect!" he shouted excitedly. "Look out world, cause here comes the new and improved Whiskers!" Whiskers hopped away excitedly, leaving Ed sitting alone and confused.

"Um… was it something I said?"


	2. The Purple Pit

Well, here's another chapter! Hope you all enjoy it.

(I still own nothing.)

Chapter 2

The next few days, Whiskers busied himself in hunting down the perfect herbs to serve his purposes. After all, Brandy had created a youth gel, hadn't she? All he had to do was keeping trying different plants until he found the right ones. Only trouble was he didn't have anyone but himself to test them on. More often than not he ended up a different color, size or shape, or sometimes even worse. But he was undeterred; he knew he was getting close.

Finally one night, after days of searching and testing, Whiskers believed he'd found the perfect combination of herbs for his experiment. He was beginning to feel like a scientist! He rushed home with his herbs as fast as he could and swung the door open, but cringed when he heard a thud. He looked around behind the door to see Brandy on the floor, holding her head and looking very dizzy.

"Oh, gosh, I'm so sorry, Brandy!" Whiskers cried, as he helped her up. "You're not gonna yell at me, are you?"

Brandy shook her head—both to get rid of her double vision and to reply "no." "Don't worry about it," she said. "I mean, normally I'd yell but I'm kinda in a hurry."

Whiskers looked down and finally noticed Brandy was wearing a new dress. It was white, with a grey stripe across the chest, with a short skirt and thin straps over her shoulders. "Where ya going?" he asked.

"It's this new hangout Lola told me about," Brandy replied, and checked her makeup in her compact mirror. "It's called the Purple Pit."

"Purple Pit? Sounds like what happened that time I got into the finger paints and had a bad itch." He raised his arm to reveal a purple stain underneath.

"Okay, I so didn't need that image. But really Whiskers, it's an awesome place. It reminds me of the clubs back home. You know… I guess you could come, if you promised not to embarrass me, or tell anyone you know me."

"Oh, as tempting as that sounds, Brandy, I think I'd rather stay home. I don't think I'd be the hip, swinging nightclub type."

Brandy shrugged her shoulders. "Alright, suit yourself," she said as she headed out the door. "But, the Purple Pit really isn't so bad. I mean, it's really just a quiet little innocent hang out for friends to get together, ya know?"

Later, at the so called "quiet little innocent hangout" known as the Purple Pit, Sugar Toad music blared from several speakers as purple fireflies dimly lit the room for the many animals assembled to dance.

Brandy, along with Lola, Cheryl and Meryl, and Margo, sat together at a corner table, listening to the music and watching for cute boys to dance with.

"Isn't this place great?" Lola asked.

"You bet!" Cheryl replied. "This place has incredible music!"

"Uh-uh," Meryl said with a shake of her head, "The cute boys that come here are the best part!"

"No, it's the music!" Cheryl growled.

"You wantin' a fight?" Meryl asked, getting right into Cheryl's face.

"Oh, you better watch yourself!" The two sisters began to fight, as usual, and Brandy just rolled her eyes.

"So, couldn't get carrot-breath to come?" Margo asked. "Thank goodness."

"Oh, leave Whiskers alone, Margo," said Brandy. "I mean, I know he's a total dork in every conceivable way, but he's not all bad."

"Still," Lola added, "maybe it is best he didn't come. I don't think it would be his kind of place."

"Oh, I don't know." Brandy rested her head in her hands. "Lately, I've come to think Whiskers is the kind of rabbit who can surprise you. Who knows? Maybe at this very minute he's headed to some kind of secret rendezvous…"

---

It was at this time that Whiskers was sneaking from the jungle back into the tree house, under the cover of darkness, to bring the last of the ingredients. He tip-toed across the jungle floor, trying to be as quiet as a mouse. But, oddly enough, there seemed to be a loud, squeaky noise whenever he took a step, despite the fact he was barefoot, and walking on a dirt path. He paused a moment to scratch his head in confusion at this, then hurried to the tree house with his last ingredient.

"Tonight's the big night," he said as he shut the door tight behind him, and set to work mixing the ingredients.

"Well, everything's ready," he said as he looked at a coconut shell cup filled with the elixir he had created. "Time for the big test." He swallowed nervously before getting up the nerve to put the cup to his lips and drink.

At first, there was no reaction. He sat down and stared at his paws, puzzled that nothing had happened. But then, he began to feel strange. His heartbeat seemed to speed up, and become louder. He began to breathe harder and faster, when suddenly a pain agitated his limbs, causing him to fall out of his chair. He crawled along the floor, as the pain intensified, and his heart began to sound like a drum in his ears. He gasped for air, as he crawled to the bunk bed and pulled himself up to look into one of Brandy's mirrors. His ears now stood straight up, and were beginning to get shorter and thinner, and he had dark circles under his eyes. And his buck teeth, which usually poked out from his mouth, were beginning to straighten themselves. He barely recognized his own face now, and gasped as another pain shot through his body. He felt as though his legs were being stretched out, and his back and neck ached terribly. Finally, Whiskers collapsed onto the floor, writhing about as the transformation took hold.

---  
"Thank you for shopping with us…" the lemur manager of the store said, as he stared in wonder at his customer. "Your new suit looks very… nice on you, sir. And we'll have your other suits and shoes ready for you no later than next week."

The customer he stared at nodded, and walked away. He exited the mall and walked through the jungle, earning several stares from all kinds of animals along the way, who looked as though they couldn't believe their eyes. Snakes paused just before devouring mice, which also stopped to stare. Eagles fell mid-flight, just trying to get a second look.

Finally, the strange figure made his way to the small Mayan temple which had been redesigned as the club called the Purple Pit, and walked inside. There, several animals were dancing as a live band played instead of the speakers, but everyone suddenly stopped and turned to look at the creature that had just walked in.

All went silent at the sight of him, and even Brandy's eyes widened at the sight. For there stood a tall, handsome white rabbit, with a small red nose, straight ears and perfect teeth, wearing a new blue suit. The rabbit looked over the crowd a moment, before they all finally returned to their previous activities.

The rabbit walked down to the juice bar and took a seat on the stool as the old boar bartender walked up.

"What'll it be?" the Boar asked gruffly.

The rabbit shook his head. "Tsk, tsk," he said, "that's no way to talk to a customer. 'What'll it be?' You gotta ask nicer! Now pay attention." When the bartender just stared at him, the rabbit pulled him down by the collar. "Now, try saying it like this: say 'What'll it be, _hmm_?' Try it."

The boar frowned, but complied. "What'll it be, _hmm_?"

"See, that was much better, much better!" The rabbit smiled and released the bartender's collar. "Now, I want you to make me an Alaskan Polar Bear Heater. Chop-chop!" The bartender grumbled and walked away to make the rabbit his drink.

The rabbit sat relaxed on his stool, but felt a hand on his shoulder and turned to see a tough-looking monkey standing over him. "Hey," said the monkey, "Why don't you pick on somebody your own disposition?" He raised his fist to make a point.

"Oh, please Mr. Barroom Brawler," the rabbit said, feigning worry, "please don't hurt me or anything like that." But then, he jumped from his seat and delivered a devastating upper-cut to the monkey's jaw, then hit him with a right that rendered him unconscious. The rabbit simply sat down again and checked his hair in a pocket mirror, as the bartender returned with some drinks.

"Hey, did you say a Polar Bear Heater?" he asked.

"No, you said a Polar Bear Heater," the rabbit replied in an annoyed tone. "I said an _Alaskan _Polar Bear Heater. It's an energy drink."

The bartender shook his head. "I never heard of it."

"Until now. Listen carefully, you might learn something. Put in a little mango juice,"

"A little mango juice," the boar muttered, and poured the liquid into a glass.

"A little soda,"

"A little soda,"

"Some vinegar,"

"Some vinga…" the Boar paused a moment. "Hey, you gonna drink this or rub it on your chest?"

"Hey, that was good!" The rabbit laughed. "That was terrific! You should have your own comedy show! 'Drink it or rub it on your chest!' That was hilarious and you did by yourself with your very own big mouth! Now shut up and pay attention. Repeat after me: I'll…"

"I'll…" the boar repeated.

"I'll pay…"

"I'll pay…"

"I'll pay _attention_."

"I'll pay attention."

"Great, now back to the drink. Some orange juice,"

"Orange juice,"

"Rum flavoring,"

"Rum flavoring,"

"A coffee bean,"

"A coffee bean,"

"A cherry," the bartender paused to blink at the rabbit, who shifted in his seat. "Some more rum flavoring."

"More rum flavoring."

"Now mix it up and pour it into a tall glass."

The bartender did as told, and began to pour the drink, but stopped. "Say, I never had one of these," he said. "Mind if I take a sip?"

"Go right ahead," the rabbit replied, and the bartender poured a little into another glass and had a small taste.

"Hmm, not bad," he said after a minute, and went back to pouring. The rabbit lifted a hand when the bartender had poured enough, and took a drink, but the bartender stood right where he was with his arm still in its pouring position. The rabbit just kept drinking, unfazed, and gave the boar a light push, causing him to fall over stiff as a board.

The rabbit finished his drink and looked around, taking in the sights, when his gaze fell upon a girl sitting not far away, talking to some boys. She was very cute, with blond hair and ears, and wore a white dress and shoes.

The rabbit smiled to himself as he stared at Brandy, and thought to himself _my night just got a lot more interesting…_

_---_

Oooh, what could this mysterious rabbit want?

Well, hope you enjoyed the chapter. That bit about "I'll pay attention..." was always one of my most favorite parts of the movie.

Anyhow, I need your help with this. I need a name for Whiskers' alter-ego. I considered just calling him Buddy Love like in the movie, but that's not too original, is it? But, I have no idea what else to call him, so I'll need ideas. Can you help me out? thanks.

Later!


	3. That Old Black Magic

Here's chapter 3, enjoy!

(I do not own BaMW, The Nutty Proffessor, or the name Buddy Love. And yes, I took the lazy route and used that name, deal with it. I do, in a way, own Whiskers' alter ego, even if I borrowed his name. But I'm not making any money anyway, so who cares? And this is the end of the disclaimer, I swear.)

Chapter 3

When Brandy first noticed the strange rabbit walk through the door, her first thought was that it was very odd that another rabbit was in the Amazon. But then again, there were other dogs in the Amazon at one time or other, and there had been at least one other rabbit, so maybe Whiskers' and her species weren't as rare in the jungle as she'd thought. Her second thought was on just how much of a hunk that rabbit was. She had no idea rabbits could even be that good looking. But then again, her only real example of a rabbit had been Mr. Whiskers so far.

She stared at the rabbit, as did nearly everyone else in the Purple Pit, for a few moments, but she decided to turn her attention away along with the others. She soon found other things to occupy her time, when she met a couple of cute elk boys and began chatting with them. They had all sat at a table together, and she was beginning to enjoy herself, when out of the corner of her eye she noticed the Rabbit stroll up to her and smile.

"Hey, Baby," he said, in a voice just a little too silky smooth for Brandy. Something about him seemed… off. "What say you ditch these guys and grace me with the honor of a dance?"

"Hey buddy," the first elk protested, "she's with us."

"Yeah, so buzz off!" the second added.

The rabbit just grinned and shook his head. "Excuse me a sec, will ya, Sweetie?" he asked Brandy, and helped her out of her seat. He then sat down and looked the elks right in the eye. "Now look, fellas," he said calmly, "How's about you just cool your jets, huh? Wouldn't want me to talk to my close, personal friend Gaspar LeGecko and have him ban you from his upcoming birthday bash, would ya? Or better yet, you wouldn't wanna get thrown down a waterfall, cause trust me when I say it ain't fun. So cool it, and if you're nice boys maybe later I'll let you both have a gumball." Both elks were rendered speechless for a moment, and the rabbit stood up and offered his arm to Brandy. "Shall we?"

It was against Brandy's better judgment—she still thought there was something fishy about this rabbit, and the fact he seemed to be a huge jerk didn't help matters. But, oddly enough, she found herself taking his arm and walking onto the dance floor with him. He took her left paw in his right, and put his other arm around her waist. He held their hands close to his chest, and they began to dance to the slow tune. All the while, Brandy looked into his eyes, wondering just what it was about them she was so fascinated by.

"I know what you're thinking," he said.

"Oh, do you?" Brandy replied flatly.

"Yeah. You're thinking 'where has he been all my life?'"

Brandy scoffed, but grinned nonetheless. "Not exactly."

"And," the rabbit continued, "you're thinking about how glad you are I got rid of those goons for ya." Brandy rolled her eyes in annoyance. True, those elks weren't the greatest conversationalists, but still… "You know, normally I would have just trashed guys like that, but I didn't wanna muss myself up and make you dance with a slob, you know?"

"Oh, so… you restrained yourself for little old me?"

"I knew you'd appreciate it. I'm always doing nice things like that."

"I see. Is that really the case or is this line 27-A for picking up girls?"

The rabbit shook his head and sighed, as if hurt. "Aw, now you see? You went and done it. For one of the rare times in my life when I dig down into the soul, you doubt my veracity. Well, that hurts."

"Well, it's not your veracity that I doubt." The two paused a moment, and the rabbit stared intently at Brandy, looking into her eyes as though he could see right through her. And, though she hated to admit it, Brandy found herself gazing back into his eyes. She finally turned away, and noticed the other dancers begin to move back to their seats. "The music stopped," she noted.

"Yeah, I heard," the rabbit replied, and took her by the hand and led her to the stage where the live band was performing. The rabbit shooed away the lemur playing the piano, telling him to take a break, and took a seat on the bench. He motioned for Brandy to sit down close by. "No, no," he said, as he flexed his arms, "this'll never do. The mood's all wrong. Hey, innkeeper! Got any sexy lights?" The lights were dimmed, and a spotlight was shown on the rabbit. He nodded in satisfaction and began to play "That Old Black Magic."

_He is pretty good, _Brandy admitted to herself as she listened to the music. She noticed she wasn't the only one to think so, as a crowd began to gathered to hear the rabbit play. He stroked the keys like a master musician, and everyone was amazed with how skillfully he played, while the other musicians decided to join in. But they were even more impressed when he began to sing.

_"That old black magic has me in its spell, that old black magic that yo-ou weave so well. Those ic-y fingers up and down my spine, the same old witchcraft when your eyes meet mine…" _

Brandy found herself staring again, and couldn't help but think just how different this rabbit was from Mr. Whiskers. She bet he couldn't play any musical instrument, or sing this good. But then again… she didn't know if he couldn't, either.

_"…Baby, down and down and down I go, round, and round and round I go, in a spin… lovin' this spin that I'm in. Under that old black magic called, old black magic called, old black magic called… love… love. Love…" _

The music ended, and Brandy realized nearly everyone in the club had gathered to hear the rabbit when they all began to clap.

"Alright," the rabbit called, "that's enough! Back, back! You're all very nice kids, and you've got great taste. If you're very good little boys and girls maybe tomorrow I'll come back and grace you with a little more of this rare talent. Now go on, shoo, shoo!" Everyone grumbled and walked away. "Nice kids," the rabbit repeated, "they've got good ears for music."

"Oh, I'm so glad," Brandy commented sarcastically. "It would be such a shame to waste your talent on common riffraff."

"Well, honey, I always say if you're good and you know it, why beat around the bush? Am I right?"

Brandy just rolled her eyes. "And I always say that to love yourself is the beginning of a life-long romance. Believe me, I Know. And after watching you, I know that you and you will be very happy together." Brandy got up to leave, but the rabbit held her arm and prevented her.

"Just a minute," he said, "I don't remember dismissing you."

Brandy turned and glared down at the rabbit. "Why you rude, discourteous egomaniac!"

The rabbit just grinned in a cocky way. "You're crazy about me, I can tell. And I can understand it. Only this morning I looked in the mirror and liked what I saw so much I couldn't tear myself away." He kissed his own hand and held it up to Brandy. "Have some, Baby?"

Brandy rolled her eyes and crossed her arms. "If I were your baby I'd hang myself from a tree."

"Aw, Brandy, that's not a nice thing to say."

Brandy was about to reply when she blinked in surprise and narrowed her eyes at the rabbit. "How did you know my name?"

The rabbit paused a moment. "Oh, well… we were introduced," he finally managed to stammer.

"No, we weren't. If we were introduced I would have remembered your name. Now, would you mind telling me what it is?"

"Oh, yeah, it's…" The rabbit tried to think of a name, when a manatee crawled past.

"Hey buddy," she said, "you really sang up a storm!"

"Yeah, thanks," the rabbit replied and waved as the manatee crawled away. "There, you see," he said to Brandy, "everybody knows Buddy."

"Buddy?" Brandy asked. "Well, is that it or do you find it difficult remembering two of them?"

"Hey, that's cute! No I don't find it difficult remembering two of them. It's Buddy… Buddy…" he became stuck again, till he heard a song on the speakers repeat the word love. "Love, that's it. Buddy Love."

"Buddy Love?"

The rabbit nodded. "Of the Las Angeles Loves." Brandy raised an eyebrow at the way he introduced himself in an almost identical manner as she did, but he just grinned.

"So, if you're from Las Angeles, what are you doing in the Amazon?"

"Oh, well you know, one minute I was on a flight headed to the zoo—I mean, my family's private resort, when suddenly something goes wrong and I'm dumped out here in the jungle. Crazy, huh?"

"Yeah, kind of, considering that's exactly what happened to me."

"Well, what a coincidence, then."

Brandy was about to say it was too much of a coincidence, but then she remembered Sandy and Mr. Frisky. Now that was a big coincidence. Not to mention the fact that Wolfie, too had fallen from a plane and became stranded in the jungle. And now that she thought of it, that other dog Tiffany had gone through the same thing. Brandy was beginning to think flying wasn't the safest way to travel, after all.

"Know what?" Buddy asked, and stood up. "It's starting to get a little dull around here. Care to join me for a little moonlight stroll?"

Brandy wanted to say no—knew she had every reason to say no—but oddly enough found herself pausing. Then, though she had no idea why, responded, "Sure, I guess. A short walk won't hurt."

"Great. Then let's go." Buddy took her by the paw and led her out of the Purple Pit.

"Hey Brandy," Lola called as they walked past, but Brandy had no time to respond before she and Buddy walked out the door. Lola watched them go with a puzzled look on her face, wondering just who that rabbit was and why Brandy would go with him.


End file.
